Title Nein

If you can't beat them, join them. If you can't join them, pass legislation.

In 1972, the U.S. Congress passed the Patsy T. Mink Equal Opportunity in Education Act or Title IX for short. The law assured that students would not be excluded from athletic actives based solely on gender. This idea sounds good on paper, but anything that involves the word 'patsy' title makes me uncomfortable.

They tried to integrate the Boy Scouts as well, but felt that it defied some law of physics. Plus none of the girls wanted to go into the wilderness for more than 15 minutes at a time.

Since its inception, Title IX has wreaked havoc on the amateur sporting world. Instead of adding women's sports, it simply cut down on the number of spaces for male athletes. Secondary sports like men's rowing and Grecco-Roman wrestling have suffered as a result.

Schools are meant to maintain equal numbers of both male and female athletes. What the creators of this legislation did not consider was football. No females participate. Occasionally, one will be a kicker, but that is the extent. Football teams incorporate close to a hundred players. A women's tennis team has about seven or eight. How is that supposed to balance out?

Some have suggested the utilization of co-ed sports under something called the 'Fabiola rule.' Just like 'patsy,' something about the word 'fabiola' makes me nervous. The proposition of co-ed sports certainly makes me nervous. The biggest problem with co-ed teams would be the team locker room situation. Figure that one out.

The feminists in support of such legislation need to figure out that women are not created equal to men. Not better or worse, but not equal either. We are just different. Women get to have babies. Men get to have football. It might sound insensitive, but it is the truth.

I suppose this means that there is no fair way to do this, just like how there is no nice way to pick teams in gym class. Someone is going to get picked last, and someone is going to get left out. That is simply the nature of sports. It is unfair, unapologetic, and competitive. If anyone can't reconcile with that, they shouldn't be playing sports.